When Will You Be Happy?

When Will You Be Happy?

Expert Author Susan Russo

“It isn’t what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about.” -Dale Carnegie

Okay my friends listen up. I have been talking to a lot of people lately who are not happy and 99% of the time they blame it on someone else or something else. Well here’s a news flash: no one can make you unhappy but you! Yes, things are going to happen in life you don’t like. Things will happen that will rock your world and turn it upside down. But…

Remember, it’s not what happens to us in life that matters, what matters is how we CHOOSE to view it. Your interpretation of what happens is how you are going to experience it. Sure, in the beginning of any mind blowing event you will be knocked off your feet. You can even have a pity party and I’ll come to it! But no one wants to attend the same party over and over again and neither should you.

Read the whole article here
How to be happy


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How to be Happy

From Self Growth .com

“Happiness resides not in possessions and not in gold; the feeling of happiness dwells in the soul.” – Democritus

I once met a woman who had a little dog. The dog was very sweet and quiet, and wore a yellow uniform that said “Therapy Dog” in block letters. I was impressed by it’s patience, and evident attention to her needs.

As she sat I watched the dog adjust so he could be closer to her. ”What a lovely friend,” I said in admiration.

“He’s supposed to make me feel better,” she said. ”But he doesn’t work.”

I did not pursue a conversation further with the woman, but I wondered how much of her life was spent frustrated that various people, animals, and events didn’t do a better job of making her happy.

At the same time, I found myself able to relate to her example. More than once I’ve gotten a job I’d been hoping for, or started a relationship, or received something else I wanted or believed I needed only to discover it didn’t make me happy. Always there has been something uncomfortable, an element that needed to be fixed so I could feel better.

Ultimately what we have to realize is that external circumstances do not make us happy or unhappy. They trigger feelings inside us, but the feelings are our own. We can control them, we can change them, without needing to change anything about our circumstances.

Some months ago, tired of hitting a wall in my life, I decided to be happy anyway. More than that, I decided I would be in a state of joy.

I practiced feeling into myself, finding an awareness of joy that had nothing to do with the outside world. I chose to do this through breathing into my center, a point two inches below the navel and an inch in toward the spine. Breathing here, I ask to activate joy in my life. I do not deny other emotions that might be present, I only ask to experience the joy which is also there. I put my attention on joy because it’s where I want to look.

I practice doing this when the dog barks, or when I’m stuck in traffic. When I’m in a hurry, when I’m overwhelmed, when my car is broken into, when I get a $300 traffic ticket for running a red light I didn’t see, and when my computer breaks down and erases my business records just before I sit down to do taxes. I practice feeling my light, my internal joy, even when I’m just thinking about these experiences.

What I didn’t expect was how external events would then change themselves to meet and encourage my new state. Not needing the world to make me happy, the world suddenly rushed to the job. Exciting new business opportunities appeared, I started earning more money without having to do extra work, I was able to do my taxes on time and receive a refund, items stolen from my car were returned, I started a new relationship, and far more.

Practice feeling the joy which is there at the deepest level. Even if you can’t feel it, look for it, ask it to be there. It will start showing up. Sometimes it will be a feeling that arises as you go about the day, sometimes it will be through an event you desire in your life. Sometimes you won’t feel it at all. You’ll feel worse because feelings that distract you from this joy will show up more clearly. Keep checking in, and those feelings will release.

Practice feeling better, and you will feel better. Don’t ask the world to do it for you. It’s not the world’s job to make you happy. It’s yours. Practice and you will become good at it, regardless of the external circumstances in your life.

What I’ve shared here is a basic outline of some very deep and profound work. I will be teaching a class, “Accepting Peace”, that explores this process in greater depth on May 25th. Learn more about it at http://www.bodyinsights.com/events/upcoming-talks/

Emotional Healing

Author’s Bio:

Sarah Lambert is a Spiritual Coach and Psychic. Using psychic channeling, trained bodywork, and emotional release techniques she helps clients connect with their Divine Purpose and transform all blocks surrounding it’s expression.

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The Secret of Life

“There was once an argument among the gods over where to hide the secret of life so men and women would not find it. One god said ‘Bury it under a mountain; they will never look there.’ ‘No’ the others said, ‘one day they will find ways to dig up mountains and will uncover it.’ Another said: ‘Sink it in the depths of the ocean; it will be safe there.’ ‘No,’ the others objected, ‘humans will one day find ways to plumb the ocean’s depths and will find it easily.’ Finally another god said: ‘Put it inside them: men and women will never think of looking for it there.’ All the gods agreed, and so that is how the secret of life came to be hidden within us.”–An ancient teaching


Eckhart Tolle TV: Creating a New Earth Together


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How to be happy with yourself

How to be happy with yourself.

If you are not happy with yourself, then you are not accepting yourself as you are. You may not want to accept yourself as you are, for you may have criteria that you want to live up to. You may want to be a better person, you may want to behave the way you think you should and maybe you are not living up to your expectations.

These are all reasons not to accept yourself as you are. You may have other reasons why you should not accept yourself the way that you are.

Are they reasons or excuses? And does it matter?

If you have a reason or excuse not to accept yourself as you are, then you also have a reason or excuse to not be happy with yourself!

Here is the problem, (rather one of the problems in relation to being happy with yourself) you want to be happy with yourself but you don’t want to accept yourself as you are. This is an impossibility to achieve.

If you are not accepting or don’t want to accept yourself as you are, then quite simply, you are rejecting yourself. How do you feel if someone rejects you? Nobody likes it, it is the most painful feeling most people have, and it is worse when the rejection comes from yourself, so how can you possibly be happy with yourself if you are rejecting yourself.

So you have a choice and decision to make:

Keep rejecting yourself and remain unhappy with yourself.


Accept yourself as you are and discover happiness with yourself.

Accepting yourself is a prerequisite to being happy with yourself, there is no point trying anything else until you are willing to accept yourself.

Accepting yourself is the starting point. If you do not accept yourself, then you are lost and to arrive at any desired destination, you have to get to the starting point first.

To accept yourself – remove all expectations of what you should be or should do. You are a human being, that’s it, nothing else. Do not place any meaning on what it means to be a human being. Accepting yourself is simply stating ‘I am’, nothing more, no judgments, no criticisms and no criteria. You are here, now.

Can you do that?

That is the beginning, once you have done that, then accept anything that comes up. If you feel that you are bad person, (for example and whatever that means to you) then accept that, say to yourself – “Right now in this moment, I am feeling that I am a bad person”. This is the truth of how you are feeling, so please just allow yourself to accept the truth of the moment. Realize that acceptance does not mean approval. By accepting the way you feel or perceive yourself, then you have stopped rejecting yourself and you are stopping a vicious cycle of continual condemnation.

You have arrived at the starting point and finally heading in the right direction.

Read more on acceptance here.


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Emotional Freedom Technique for LOVE

from PsychoSpiritual

Emotional Freedom Technique for LOVE

by Sherri Carter, MS, ATH Co-Editor of PsychoSpiritual Editor’s Note from Sherri Carter: I love Emotional Freedom Technique! It really gets to the root issues, helps to release limiting beliefs while creating new emotional attachments to new truths of possibility! read the rest

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The Need for Acceptance

The Need for Acceptance

“Knowing others is wisdom; knowing the self is enlightenment.”– Tao Te Ching

Before we are born, whilst we are in the womb, we are part of the womb, part of the mother, all connected, an intermingling of chemicals, energy and whatever else is there. When we are born, a physical connection is severed. And we breathe to obtain oxygen and we suckle at the breast for nutrition. Our senses pick up more sensations and we do not yet have the understanding that we are ourselves, that we are separate. We are very aware of how wonderful we feel. We are very aware of being, but we are unaware that what we see is not us. As a baby we feel that everything in our world is us, we cannot distinguish between out there and in here.

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Digging a little deeper

In the last posting I mentioned the importance of ‘I can’, this is important for you in achieving your goal, for it acts as a door opener. It begins to establish a direction which leads to the future, and somewhere along that direction or path is the future you, with the successful attainment of your goal.

The mind automatically follows a direction, and if you are not happy with your results today, then you have followed a direction that is incompatible with your desires. If you are unhappy, sad, depressed etc then these results are compatible with the direction/path that you are on. You have been following this path for years or if not that long, then since a life changing event. A life changing event creates a change in direction, which is why it is life changing. From the moment the direction changed your life is different.

When articulating the problem, we generally look at the details, yet it is the big picture that needs articulating first. Once you are aware of the big picture, then the details can be seen where they fit into the big picture.

The problem can be detailed such as ‘I am unhappy with my life and I want to be happy with my life’ or something similar. This is the general big picture in relation to happiness. It is important not to look for blame with statements such as ‘I am unhappy because ……’ This is a natural tendency, for we feel if we know the cause then we can fix the problem and we want to fix it as soon as possible. But when we do this, we are simply creating a knee jerk reaction to some minor part in the problem, we are not looking at the big picture.

The problem is that you are experiencing life a certain way and you desire a different experience. Though this is simple, it can be confusing for we are used to seeking details.

Bear with me as I continue to harp on what may seem an insignificant point. When we are struggling in any area and we are unhappy with life, then we naturally look for simplistic causes, for this is the way the conscious mind and our ego function. They are very linear and see everything in terms of A caused B and B caused C. And as it is You (the identity of the ego and conscious mind), then you will simply function this way.

However, your experience of life is determined by the unconscious patterns which are in harmony with the unconscious direction. The pattern and direction always co exist in harmony. The pattern and direction joined together create your life experience.

So in looking to be happy, you need to change the patterns and the direction of your life.  To show you a little about the power of patterns and direction, please reflect on these questions:

  1. If you had happiness now, you were happy with yourself and you were happy with your life, would this fit? Can you see yourself remaining like this for the rest of your life? Are you the type of person who can be like this? Are you worth it? Have you the right to be happy? Do you have permission to be happy? Do not answer too quickly or get angry at the questions, just allow yourself to reflect and be curious of what answers emerge. Because you want to be happy etc, but are there any parts of yourself that do not want this goal. Are any parts of your unconscious that is against you achieving your goal?


  1. What is the worst thing that will happen if you are happy with yourself etc? This may sound like a weird question, and what is the first response (after you say nothing) you get? It doesn’t matter how ridiculous the answer is.

What could be some of the benefits of remaining how you are?

In every situation there are costs and benefits, in no. 2 above you may be aware of the benefits to being happy, but not the costs and in no. 3 you probably are aware of the costs of having a lack of happiness but not the benefits. What you are unaware of is the unconscious motivation and the unconscious is very aware of costs in no.2 and the benefits in no.3.

See how you go with these questions and your reflections. To be continued:

 Relative to the level of awareness that is possible for us, our ordinary state of consciousness is as far from a direct

experience of reality as sleep is from waking consciousness.

                             — Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson

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“I can”

Being happy with yourself – “I can”

“The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.” — Alvin Toffler

What can I do? This is an important question to ask when one wants to overcome a problem, and being sad and unhappy is a problem for it interferes with the smooth functioning of the body and the appreciation of the life experience. Being sad or unhappy occasionally as a result of certain effects is understandable and desirable. But many are unhappy with themselves and so unhappiness is a continual undercurrent of their life.

So “What can I do?” is asked in relation to the perceived problem. How do you perceive the problem? The first step in finding a solution to a problem is to fully understand and articulate the ‘problem’. Many assume they know what the problem is and yet are actually unaware of the real problem. So the real solution will not be found. You may be unhappy, sad depressed, these are effects or symptoms and though they create additional problems, they are not the problem.

If you are happy with yourself then you will not have these problems. Though this is true, the wrong assumption of finding, trying or know how to be happy will provide happiness and therefore problem solved. Most of the how to be happy techniques only have a temporary effect as they do not address the underlying problem. So without a clear understanding of the problem, when you ask “What can I do?” you become deflated and feel vulnerable, for you probably assume that you can do very little.

This is a huge mistake and a lie. Feeling that you can do little or nothing, you then put your life in the hands of the experts, whoever that may be. It may seem logical to trust these people, but putting your life in the hands of anyone, has the unconscious meaning that you have no control over your life and living. This is detrimental to the healing process. You truly become a victim of your unhappiness rather than master of your health, life and living.

Seeking expert help is extremely beneficial and should be sought, but make sure you are in control. You are enlisting their help and assistance. They are not there to ‘fix’ you, you are there to learn something valuable to use in your life. You are using them to empower yourself. When you ask the question “What can I do?” Answer, “I will be happy with myself”, “I will love myself”, “I will be healthy” or use “I can” instead of “I will”. “I will” has a commitment applied and is therefore stronger and leads into the future. Though if this doesn’t feel true, then use “I can”, this accepts the possibility that you or anybody can be happy with themselves. Realize that “I can” or “I will” is more important than knowing how! Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you have to know how. The how will Always appear once you accept “I will”.

Knowing and committing to a goal is a prerequisite to knowing how. Once you accept that you will be healthy (or achieve any goal) the creative unconscious mind will create or discover the how to. Become an ‘I can’ person, overcoming obstacles, no matter how difficult, makes you a stronger person. In reality, nothing is too hard or difficult once you admit ‘I can’. When you state ‘I can’ you unleash unconscious potentials, that you most likely were not aware of. You have exactly the right amount of potential and capacity to achieve health, happiness and freedom, within you, this is a fact. ‘I can’ is a gateway to that potential. Try it out! Next I will write about articulating the underling problem.


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Life Patterns the Secret to Emotional Freedom

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The Power of Attitude

Wow, you have to see this video…

Just received it in an email and passing it on for you to watch

It will guide you into a super-positive attitude, reduce your stress, and help you re-connect to your passion for life! Are you ready for this? …

* Watch It Here –>

It’s called “The Power Of Attitude” Enjoy!


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How to be happy with yourself.

The beginning.

Being happy is certainly desirable and I will be writing to show you, how to be happy, enjoy life and when you are near the end of your days, you can look back and say ‘That was a life worth living”. Many people when they are near the end of their journey on earth, look back and have deep regrets for they feel that they wasted their life and ‘It wasn’t a life worth living’.

Being happy is naturally preferable to being unhappy and yet so many spend a lot of time being sad, depressed, hurt and suffering. To be blunt, this is a waste of time and life. There is no good reason not to have a happy and wonderful life.

I will explore through this site, the art of living well, I will show you how the mind works and how to achieve what you want. This site will be an informative site and will delve into the mechanisms of human behaviour and explore techniques for the achievement of a wonderful and successful life.

In relation to happiness – you may have the desire to be happy with yourself and this occurs as you gain joy. Joy is a much more expansive quality, it arises when you are in harmony. In harmony with what? Simply being in harmony with what is. I could say in harmony with the universe and this would also be true. So while I will be writing about how to be happy with yourself, you will be journeying towards experiencing Joy.

Cheers Philip Martin

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